Tim and I were married while going to college. We both wanted to have children but were okay with waiting a while. We decided that the best form of birth control for us would be me taking the pill. Well after several months we decided that my body did not like this and chose to use other forms.
After about three years of marriage and me graduating from college we decided we would really actively start trying to make this baby thing happen. We realized because of some of my hormone issues this was not going to be an easy road. I don't really remember how long we did each step but what I do remember is thinking that this might never happen.
I started at first just taking hormone pills. Let's just say during this time I might have been a little hormonal, to say the least. lol Poor Tim. I remember standing outside on our back porch just crying and Tim would ask me what is wrong and I couldn't tell him. I think my exact words were "leave me alone, I don't know why I am crying" in the nicest way possible of course. Being infertile and taking hormones is extremely hard on a marriage even one that is a strong one.
After about a year of just taking oral medication I started taking shots also. If I thought I was emotional with the oral medication this only got worse when taking the shots. I can't really remember how long I took the shots for but they didn't seem to get the job done either. I won't go through what all Tim had to do during this time because everyone knows that dads don't want to discuss it. Anyway, lets just say that it wasn't easy for him either.
At this point our doctor suggested AI which is artificial insemination. Just encase you didn't know. So now I am taking pills, a shot and then at just the right time they would perform an AI. I think the first two times this didn't work. I remember having people pray for me at the exact time the procedure was going to happen. I have to give a shout out to my doctors at this point. I remember the right time was on a Saturday one month and he came in when the clinic was closed to do the procedure. Thanks Dr. Bailey
In December of 2000 we were going to celebrate our five year anniversary in Hawaii. This was before we had children and therefore had a little money. Since I wanted to be semi normal, really who is totally normal, during our trip we decided we would take the month off of any drugs or procedures and we would start back up in January. This was the best decision ever. I think it is what my body needed. In January of 2001 I took the pills, the shot, received an AI and God decided to grant our desires to have a child.
I distinctively remember during this time a devotion I had. I was setting on the couch reading the story of Hannah. Which by the way I love this story. This story hits home with anybody that has infertility. I remember praying to God and asking why, why won't you give us a child. I remember promising if he would just give us a child that we would raise him in the church and at this point I felt like the Lord spoke directly to me. He said it is going to happen. After the years of pleading and begging God decided that he would give us the desires of our hearts.
Now that desire is a whopping 8 years old. God in all of his wisdom knew exactly what we needed and the timing of when it needed to take place.
Three years later God decided to give us another gift without us evening trying. God is good.
Five years later God decided to give us another gift while we were trying to prevent it. God is really good all the time.
Your way is holy! No god is great like God! You're the God who makes things happen; you showed everyone what you can do
I was reading Psalms 77 this morning. 1 I yell out to my God, I yell with all my might, I yell at the top of my lungs. He listens. 2 I found myself in trouble and went looking for my Lord; my life was an open wound that wouldn't heal. When friends said, "Everything will turn out all right," I didn't believe a word they said. 3 I remember God - and shake my head. I bow my head - then wring my hands. 4 I'm awake all night - not a wink of sleep; I can't even say what's bothering me. 5 I go over the days one by one, I ponder the years gone by. 6 I strum my lute all through the night, wondering how to get my life together. 7 Will the Lord walk off and leave us for good? Will he never smile again? 8 Is his love worn threadbare? Has his salvation promise burned out? 9 Has God forgotten his manners? Has he angrily stalked off and left us? 10 "Just my luck," I said. "The High God goes out of business just the moment I need him." 11 Once again I'll go over what God has done, lay out on the table the ancient wonders; 12 I'll ponder all the things you've accomplished, and give a long, loving look at your acts. 13 O God! Your way is holy! No god is great like God! 14 You're the God who makes things happen; you showed everyone what you can do - 15 You pulled your people out of the worst kind of trouble, rescued the children of Jacob and Joseph.