Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Boots are made for walking

Because I think everybody needs a good laugh.  

Yesterday I was in a CPE class in Springdale. It was torture...governmental accounting.  Seriously you want to poke your eyes out it is so boring.  I didn't eat any breakfast so when I got to the class I ate a granola bar.  As soon as I ate it I started feeling bad.  All day I struggled. Was it the speaker that was making me deathly ill or a bug.  I really wasn't sure.   He was a really bad speaker. Imagine monatone speech for eight hours straight on a REALLY REALLY boring subject.  Blah blah blah for eight hours. Tell me again why I chose accounting.

Finally around eleven I went to my car.  Took a little nap trying to conquer the nausea.  Seriously I haven't let myself puke in years.  I have great will power. So after skipping the lunch I went and got a sprite and some cheezits. That is suppose to help right....not so much. I had a really sweet older lady that showed me great concern.  I am thinking about asking her if she would like an adopted granddaughter.   I told her I didn't think I would make it to the end of the day so I wanted to go ahead and sign the sign out sheet. She asked me several times during the day how I was doing. I don't know if she has any grandkids but she would be the perfect grandmother.

So around 3:30 I couldn't deal with it any longer.  This is where it gets funny.  As I grab my things and head out the door.  The nausea became overwhelming. I get to the door and start thinking I am not going to make it. Bekah just get out of the door... Lord please just help me get out of here. Door opens. "Praise the Lord" fresh air.  I can see my car...I can do this, I can do this.  Get to the middle of the street and the fire hydrant of puking commenced.   Seriously imagine a grown lady puking in the middle of the driveway.  If I had been a bystander I would have definitely been laughing.... as soon as I got over my gag reflex.  Bekah a few more steps and you will make it to your car. Hallelujah I made it to the sidewalk...hello here it comes again. Praying all the time no one is looking out the window.  Let just say sneezing is bad for old ladies puking is worse. Finally I make it to my car open the door and here it comes again.  At least now I have the coverage of the door hiding my total unladylikeness.  I am a really bad puker.  The parking lot may never be the same.  I do feel a little sorry for those that would need to take the same path I did to get to their car.  Grace is required for those who do not puke gracefully from those that will follow after you. Literally.  Come to find out when you puke on asphalt it splatters. A LOT.  At this point I am asking myself will Tim clean up my boots for me.  My hair...dang this long hair.  Where is a ponytail holder when you need one.   Lord please just let me get home before I get sick again. Yes I can laugh about this now...yesterday not so funny.  

Annabelle had many questions about why I was sick. Why did you get sick?  Why do you need to shower?  Why can't I lay in bed with you?  Tim did mention the boots this morning (after taking the above picture)...with my sweetest smile I mentioned that I thought he might clean them up for me. The only way this day could have been more embarrassing is if I had done it in the middle of class.   

So as you go about your day today you can be thankful that this isn't your story.

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